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How to explain it? After Spitzer: "Mommy, What's an Assignation?"By Rick Horowitz This is the first time I've ever written to you, but I don't know where else to turn, and I'm hoping you can help me with a situation in my family. My 9-year-old son (I'll call him "Roscoe") has always been attracted to politics. He collects politicians' pictures the way other kids collect baseball cards, and instead of batting averages, he memorizes congressional redistricting maps. Up
to now, it's all been pretty harmless, but recently a prominent politician
from our state has been caught in some very unsavory behavior, and he's
had to resign from his office. (I think you know who I'm talking about.)
"Roscoe" has always looked up to public officials as his heroes, and
while we're not sure how much he understands about this particular situation,
it's made him very sad. We want to be able to talk him through his concerns
and cheer him up, but in an age-appropriate way. Any suggestions? Suffering in Schenectady
I certainly sympathize with your situation. It's upsetting any time a hero falls, and all the more so when the hero worshipper is young, and inexperienced in the ways of the world. But perhaps you can make "Roscoe" feel better by letting him know that the behavior of this particular public official is definitely the exception, and not the rule. In fact, you can assure your son that most public officials behave in a manner that is completely contrary to that of the disgraced individual in question. To help you with that conversation, here are some "talking points" you might find useful: While the "disgraced individual" used an eighth-floor room of a fancy hotel to engage in his unfortunate behavior, most public officials confine themselves to hotel banquet rooms, or occasionally "function" rooms. They seldom go higher than the mezzanine. While the "disgraced individual" was alone in that hotel room with just one other person, most public officials visiting a fancy hotel surround themselves with dozens, or even hundreds, of other people. Prominent people always conduct themselves better in large crowds. While the "disgraced individual" indulged in behavior generally known -- and widely condemned -- as an "assignation," most public officials far prefer the behavior known as a "fundraiser." While the "disgraced individual" arranged to have his companion travel across state lines to meet him, most public officials will go where the money is. While the "disgraced individual" paid thousands of dollars for a few hours of his companion's time, most public officials are paid thousands of dollars for a few hours of their time. While the "disgraced individual"'s companions are rated on a "diamond" system, according to the level of service they provide, most public officials provide different levels of service -- a dinner speech, a private reception, a handshake, an autographed photo, an earmark -- according to the level of contribution they receive. And lastly: While the "disgraced individual" probably slinked out of the hotel room when the event in question was over, most public officials still expect to get a standing ovation. So you can tell your son to hold his head up high -- one fallen hero does not an avalanche make. Indeed, after your little discussion, it should be perfectly clear to "Roscoe," and to children everywhere: Most public officials never do anything that embarrasses them. Posted 3/13/08. You'll
never be embarrassed when you click to "Rick's" -- tell the neighbors!
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Rick Horowitz
