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Dr. King goes commercial "I Have a Deal"?By Rick Horowitz I'm with Julian Bond on this one. "It's a sad situation, but that's America." And for that matter: "I guess this is just proof that in America even the most sacred icons of the civil rights movement are not immune to exploitation and commercialization." What the chairman of the NAACP is talking about is a new TV ad featuring Martin Luther King Jr. on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in 1963, delivering his historic "I Have a Dream" speech. Except that the crowd is missing, digitally "disappeared" from those otherwise-awesome pictures. And except that Dr. King isn't pushing civil rights. He's pitching a voice-and-data network. His words haven't changed, but they've been pressed into a different kind of crusade. "Before you can inspire," the voiceover tells us as the camera pans the now-empty spaces around the Reflecting Pool, "before you can touch, you must first connect. And the company that connects more of the world is -- " Not a chance; they're getting plenty of publicity without my help. Nobody's talking numbers, but you can bet that these folks forked over a pretty penny -- plenty of pretty pennies -- to the King family to get permission to use the famous footage. Of course, it wouldn't be the first time that the family has been willing to make profitable use of Dr. King's memory and legacy. You'd like to think they'd draw the line an inch or two short of here, though, wouldn't you? A little bit short of turning one of the 20th century's most inspiring, most influential speeches into just another piece of commercial clutter? But hey -- if they can get into it, so can I. And why stop at manipulating the visuals? Toss a little dubbing magic at the soundtrack, too, and Dr. King can be finally be a man for all causes. I can hear it now... "...I say to you today, my friends, that in spite of the difficulties and frustrations of the moment, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream -- and Sealy Posturepedic makes it possible. "I have a dream that one day this nation will live out the true meaning of its creed: 'We hold these truths to be self-evident: At McDonald's, we love to see you smile.' "I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slaveowners will be able to sit down together at a table full of Poppin' Fresh biscuits from Pillsbury. I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the chip speed of their PowerBook. I have a dream today! "I have a dream that one day little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls and walk together as the United Colors of Benetton. I have a dream today! "I have a dream that one day we will all know what Invesco knows, that we will all be free to move about the country on Southwest Airlines, that every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, thanks to the quality workmanship of John Deere tractors. Nothing runs like a Deere -- I have a dream today! "This will be the day when all of God's children will be able to sing with a new meaning, 'My country, 'tis of thee, I want my MTV, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of deep-cleaning Tide, from every mountainside, let freedom ring with 1000 anytime minutes from Sprint Free & Clear! Let freedom ring with nights and weekends free! Let freedom ring!' "When we let freedom ring from every village and every hamlet, from every mall and every megastore, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, Visas and MasterCards, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual: "'Got milk?'" Posted 3/29/01. Award-winning
satire right here twice a week -- tell your friends!
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Rick Horowitz
