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Trust him Duped on the StreetBy Rick Horowitz
" -- and welcome back to 'Stuck on Stock.' We're in luck -- here to talk about what's hot and what's not on Wall Street, we're joined by one of America's most influential analysts. From Merrill Morgan Boston Barney, say hello to Henry Fudgit. Great to see you again, Henry." "Always nice to be here, Chris." "Well, what goodies do you have for us today? Our viewers are hanging on every word!" "Always glad to help, Chris, so let's kick things off with a little company we're very high on: DogDroppings.com. It's a Web-based personal-hygiene system for pets, which -- " "All pets? Not just dogs?" "That's the beauty of it -- all pets. We see really broad appeal here. They're about to take it public, and we think it'll go up like a rocket. A strong buy." "Write it down, folks: DogDroppings.com. Let's take a quick break, and we'll return with more of Henry's tips in just a sec. Stay with us." "What a piece of junk." "DogDroppings?" "Those people can't manage a pooper scooper! I don't know how they think they're -- " "And we're back. Our guest today is Henry Fudgit, with the inside word from Wall Street. Henry, before the break you were letting our viewers in on an exciting newcomer, DogDroppings.com. Anything else out there that's caught your eye lately?" "You bet there is, Chris: Flounder2go." "And they are...?" "Only the best online fish-delivery site we've come across in weeks. We had a peek at their marketing plan the other day, and we couldn't have been more impressed. If you're betting on the health-food trend continuing, and you want to put your money into something fishy, Flounder2go is the place to be." "Another strong buy?" "I'd say a must buy. A few clever people are really going to clean up on this one." "You heard him: Flounder2go. Get your broker on your speed-dial while we take another quick break -- we'll be right back with more of Henry's hotties." "They're going right down the toilet." "Online fish delivery?!" "And it's not even summer yet! Do you have any idea how bad that stuff is going to smell?" "I can't believe they'd -- " "And how much money we're going to make on their underwriting business? We just hold our noses a while longer, and -- " "Welcome back. We're still here with Henry Fudgit, the Wonder Tout. You're absolutely right, Henry, what you were saying during the break: The smell of success is like no other smell in the world. Speaking of which, I think we've got a few seconds left for one more recommendation." "Then it has to be eDrool. Talk about filling a niche! These guys know that proper saliva flow is the key to your health, and they've built the software to make it happen. An essential buy." "And just so there's no confusion, Henry: You'd be saying the very same thing whether or not your firm were serving as eDrool's investment banker. Hypothetically speaking, of course." "Oh, absolutely! We offer our best judgment, that's all. And if our advice makes it possible for Merrill Morgan Boston Barney's partners to make millions, then we know we're doing our job." "Customers." "Excuse me?" "You said Merrill Morgan Boston Barney's 'partners.' You meant 'customers.' " "Of course." Posted
4/11/02. Rick gives you the outside word twice every week! It's
like money in the bank. (More or less.)
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