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Golden State Left Coast LunacyBy Rick Horowitz (The humor angle -- maybe you can start with the humor angle.) Why shouldn't he announce it on Leno? The whole election's a joke! Or... 175 gubernatorial candidates walk into a bar, the bartender says, "What are you having?" And the 175 gubernatorial candidates say, "Gray Davis on the rocks." Or... Hey, remember when California was such a fun state, nobody could remember what they did the night before? Now everyone's got Total Recall! Or .. Can't you just see Arnold Schwarzenegger debating Arianna Huffington? Talk about your California accents! Or even... Gary Coleman's running, too -- he says he's the least qualified candidate in the whole race. But you know Gary: always selling himself short! (Rim shot. Then you can go for the travelogue angle.)) "...sunny California, where song-and-dance man George Murphy was once a United States senator, where former governor Jerry Brown used to date pop star Linda Ronstadt, and where a movie actor named Ronald Reagan..." (Got it. How about playing up the intrigue?) Did Dianne get snookered by Arnold? The way it all spun out on Wednesday, you've got to wonder if the canny veteran got played for a sucker by the new guy. For weeks now, the Schwarzenegger camp has been leaking the word that their boy was not going to do it -- safety concerns, family obligations, whatever. And for weeks, Sen. Feinstein was able to resist the pleas from nervous Democrats that she enter the race herself. As long as no big-name Republicans jumped in against him (and Democrats stayed united behind him), there was a chance that Gov. Davis might survive the recall after all. Schwarzenegger would have been one of the biggest names -- and certainly the longest. (Hey, you already did the humor thing!) Anyway, with only days left before the filing deadline and Schwarzenegger apparently a non-factor, Feinstein finally announced on Wednesday that she was definitely staying out. And wouldn't you know it? Within hours, Schwarzenegger dropped the bombshell: He was getting in! And with Feinstein on the sidelines, there isn't another Democrat available with a fraction of her name recognition or popularity. Plenty of finesse from the old muscle builder, yes indeed, and it may have paid off big time. Or will Feinstein change her mindstein? (I thought I told you to -- oh, forget it. How about the government-and-politics angle?) The good thing about elections is that they decide things. Sometimes the decision gives you heartburn, but at least it's a decision. The losers lick their wounds, and the winners set about trying to do what they promised to do. Not anymore. If recall fever continues to spread, finality is...finished. Election Day will be just another day on the calendar. The losers can keep trying until they get it right, while the winners will never be able to unpack their bags. And another thing: The losers will almost certainly be the angrier folks, the more motivated folks. Which means they'll be the ones most likely to turn out for a recall election. Which means that the voting population for a recall could be very different from the voting population for the election the recall is intended to undo. And all that goes double if the recall forces happen to have right-wing radio honking away for their side. Arnold Schwarzenegger may not be most conservatives' cup of tea exactly, but deep in a strategy room somewhere, those same conservatives have certainly caught the whiff of something exciting: the amazing advantages of the handpicked, and highly energized, electorate. (Fine. Why don't you wrap it up with some of that philosophical stuff?) Remember when we promised we'd never be frivolous again? Posted 8/7/03. It's
coast-to-coast commentary from syndicated columnist Rick Horowitz --
get the word out!
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Rick Horowitz
