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Many mouths, many words Single-Bullet Theory -- Among OthersBy Rick Horowitz
" -- and welcome to 'This Week in Diplomacy.' With us this evening to discuss the latest developments in the world of negotiated neighborliness, Dr. Jeremy McWhereas, who's with the Institute for Striped Pants right here in Washington. Greetings, Jeremy -- good to have you back." "Very nice to be here, Wendell -- thanks for inviting me." "Well, it's been quite a week, hasn't it? All sorts of diplomatic activity on many fronts, but the top story at the moment is certainly the president's deal with the House of Representatives, an agreement that gives him vital bipartisan support for future action against Iraq." "Absolutely, Wendell. It took hours of tough bargaining, but with this one move, I think the president's gone a long way toward neutralizing a difficult and dangerous adversary." "Do you really think it'll be that much easier now to get rid of Saddam Hussein?" "I was talking about Tom Daschle." "Oh. Well, yes, Daschle's certainly been isolated, too, after Congressman Gephardt suddenly agreed to sign on to the president's plan after winning some concessions. Daschle, and Joe Biden, and for that matter, even Dick Lugar, a respected Republican on foreign-policy issues -- they preferred a somewhat narrower resolution." "That's right." "And the chance that they'll still prevail in the Senate?" "About as likely as Saddam spending Christmas vacation in Crawford, Texas." "You don't see it." "I can't even dream it." "The administration does want Saddam out, though -- and there was plenty of talk this week about just how that might be accomplished. Jeremy, what do you make of it?" "Well, that all depends on who's doing the talking. For months now, as you know, the president himself has been arguing for removing Saddam from power. But just in the past few days, he's taken a somewhat softer line -- he's mostly been talking about 'disarming' Saddam." "Getting rid of any weapons of mass destruction." "Exactly -- and any programs to develop such weapons. The thinking is, Mr. Bush is sounding more conciliatory because he'll need France and China and Russia's support at the U.N." "They've all got veto power on the Security Council. Now, what about the president's press secretary, Ari Fleischer? Listening to him this week, it certainly doesn't sound as if the administration has changed its goals." "Not at all. In fact, Ari Fleischer said -- I think I'm quoting him directly here -- he said, 'The policy is regime change, and that remains the American position.' And he went even further than that -- he said there are ways of getting rid of Saddam that cost a lot less than a military invasion." "A one-way ticket out of the country?" "That was one option he mentioned. But it was the other one that attracted most of the attention. He said -- and I have it right here -- 'The cost of one bullet, if the Iraqi people take it on themselves, is substantially less' than what it would cost to invade." "Doesn't U.S. law still prohibit the assassination of foreign leaders? Even bad ones?" "It certainly does. But there's no law against encouraging other people to do it. Apparently there's not even any law against the CIA working with various Iraqi dissidents, and who knows? Maybe one of those gentlemen will have an itchy trigger finger." "So the administration is still 100 percent committed to removing Saddam one way or -- " "Unless you listen to Colin Powell. What Powell's now saying is, well, if Saddam really does allow inspectors in, really does disarm -- well, that's kind of a 'regime change,' too." "So the press secretary wants Saddam dead, and the secretary of state wants him behaving himself? And they're both representing the same president?" "Nobody ever said diplomacy was pretty." Posted 10/3/02. Nobody
ever said Rick was pretty either. Funny is another matter -- tell your
friends!
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Rick Horowitz
