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In command Looking at the Leading IndicatorsBy Rick Horowitz
"You've got to be kidding." Bunk's voice drips with disbelief. If his eyebrows were cocked any higher, they'd escape his face altogether and start orbiting the ceiling fan. From across the kitchen table, there's no reaction -- not a word of protest or explanation. Not even a hint of embarrassment, though everything in Bunk's manner makes it clear that embarrassment is the only appropriate response. He could let the silence sit there, but that wouldn't be Bunk. Anything worth saying is worth saying twice, he reminds himself, so he says it again, with feeling. "You've got to be kidding." And -- finally -- Debunk stirs. "Why would I kid about something like that?" "So you're 'pretty sure' Kerry would make a good commander in chief." "That's what I said, isn't it? You have any more Diet Coke?" Bunk and Debunk -- friends forever, and political opposites for nearly as long. This time it's the kitchen, but it could have been the pizza place, or the sidewalk right outside the pizza place, or the middle of some busy street on the way back from the pizza place, with angry cars and SUVs whizzing by. Bunk and Debunk love a good argument. From time to time -- no more often than they blink, or breathe -- the presidential race catches their attention. This is one of those times. "Say when." "When. That's plenty -- thanks." "No problem. Anyway, you were saying...?" Bunk knows what Debunk was saying. He simply enjoys making him repeat it. At some point, Bunk is convinced, the utter ridiculousness of Debunk's position will be clear, even to Debunk. Then he'll come over to Bunk's side and thank Bunk for correcting his muddy thinking. Bunk has been awaiting these conversions for a decade or two. He's still waiting. (He likes to think of himself as an optimist.) "I was saying," Debunk is saying, "that I'm pretty sure John Kerry will make a good commander in chief. I can't be 100 percent, because you still have to see how he actually performs when the time comes." "'Pretty sure.'" "The guy could be a little clearer about stuff -- in his own head, and then what he says about it. I wouldn't mind that. And I don't think the world's suddenly going to be our best pals just because Kerry's elected. It'll take a lot of -- " "And you're willing to take that risk?" Bunk moves in for the kill. "We're right in the middle of a war on terror, and you're willing to put your trust in someone you're only 'pretty sure' about?" Debunk takes a long sip from his glass, then another. Bunk watches him carefully; he wants to see Debunk's concession take shape right there on his face, wants to hear it from the very instant the words start forming on his tongue. What he gets instead is a smile, and a question. "Is Kerry running unopposed?" Bunk has all he can do to keep from falling out of his chair. "Of course he's not running unopposed! He's running against George Bush! And he's -- " "So I guess the question isn't whether Kerry is perfect, is it? It's how he compares to the other guy." "The other guy who's already running the war." "Good point -- Bush is already running the war. Great point." Bunk sits back. Mission accomplished. He's busy mapping out his victory lap when Debunk speaks again. "So I guess Bush deserves the credit for all the progress we're making over there." "Absolutely! It's only fair." "And the blame for all the things that are going wrong over there." "Now, wait a -- " "It's only fair. Isn't that what you said?" Bunk sticks his victory lap back in his pocket. He's about to try digging himself out of this sudden hole when, just as suddenly, Debunk breaks into a grin and extends a hand. "You're right, you know," says Debunk. "I'm only pretty sure John Kerry will make a good commander in chief." "See? What did I -- " "But I'm totally sure George Bush won't." Posted 10/21/04.
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Rick Horowitz
