Peace (For Now) Talks

By Rick Horowitz

In the news: Iraq reported "pleased" with diplomatic end to crisis.

"Did you hear? Did you hear? They've worked it all out!"

"Great! Worked what all out?"

"With Iraq. They figured out something so there won't be any fighting! Everyone agreed to it -- I think that Russian guy put it together."

"Great! Always nice to see the Russians being helpful. So what did they work out exactly?"

"Well, they said the inspectors can go right back in and start looking for Iraqi weapons again. They're not saying the Americans can't be on the inspection teams anymore. And they're not telling the Americans they have to leave the country."

"Great! And the Iraqis agreed to that?"

"Absolutely -- they even announced it in Baghdad: The inspection teams can come back and do their jobs, they said. Including the Americans. Right away."

"And what did we have to do for the Iraqis?"

"I don't think anything. Madeleine Albright said it had to be `unconditional' -- no concessions."

"And everyone else?"

"The same thing. Well, the Russians are going to try to get the U.N. to lift the sanctions, and -- "

"The Russians are the ones with the big oil deals pending with Iraq?"

"I think so -- and maybe the French, too. And there was some talk the other day about letting Iraq sell more of its oil for food if they let the inspectors in. You know, like a carrot instead of a stick."

"Great."

"But that's all separate. Even the Iraqi guy said afterward that nobody made any `specific commitments.'"

"No 'specific' commitments?"

"That's what he said. I guess they just saw all those aircraft carriers and fighter planes headed their way and decided to cut out all the funny business. I mean, it was getting a little scary there for a while, wasn't it?"

"Scary?"

"All those ships and planes and all -- one little spark and the whole thing could have blown up."

"And now?"

"Now it's peaceful again. Now everything's back to the way it was."

"And that was...?"

"The inspectors can keep trying to figure out if Iraq has been making any secret chemical or biological weapons. Or nuclear. See, the inspectors thought they were really close to finding something big --"

"And that's when Iraq covered up the surveillance cameras and picked a fight with the inspectors? When they were right on the verge of catching them at it?"

"I guess so."

"So you're saying it took the inspectors months -- years, maybe -- to track the stuff down. And just when they were ready to close the net, to show what Iraq is really up to, Iraq found a way to keep the inspectors out for almost three weeks?"

"I guess so."

"Plenty of time to hide everything all over again?"

"I guess so."

"And make the inspectors start all over again?"

"I guess so."

"And produce even more weapons in the meantime?"

"I guess so. But at least there won't be any fighting. That's something, isn't it?"

"Great...."

11/21/97